stop and go

if i don't say this now
i will surely break
as i'm leaving the one
i want to take
forgive the urgency
but hurry up and wait
my heart has started to...
separate...

there now
steady love
so few come and don't go
will you
won't you
be the one i'll always know
when i'm losing my control
the city spins around
you're the only one
who knows
to slow it down.

__________________________________________________


when you're dreaming with a broken heart
then waking up
is the hardest part

you roll out of bed
and down on your knee
and for a moment
you can hardly breathe
wondering if you were really here
are you standing in my room
no you're not

do i have to fall asleep
with roses in my hand
would you get them if i did...
no you won't
cuz you're gone gone gone gone gone...

__________________________________________________


looking for something i've never seen
alone and i'm in between
the place that i'm from and
the place that i'm in
a city i've never been
i found a friend or should i say a foe
said just a few things you should know
we don't want you to see
we come and we go
here today
gone tomorrow

we're only taking turns
holding this world
it's how it's always been
when you're older
you will understand

if i say who i know it just goes to show
you need me less than i need you
take it from me
we don't give sympathy
you can trust me trust nobody
but i said you and me
we don't have honesty
the things we don't want to speak
i'll try to get out
but i never will
traffic is perfectly still

when i'm older
i might understand.

seem like 25 won't do the trick.

__________________________________________________


i declare
that holidays have ended.
the only word to describe it is...
short.

time to stop thinking
and start again.

running numbers

it's one of those days
where looking and going back
brings me back to a time
which was great.

on the holidays now.
where i don't really know what to do
with free time.

i think...
why do i keep myself busy.
simply i avoid

there we go...
just a minute ago
i made plans to keep my next couple hours
busy before i go fall asleep.

__________________________________________________


i have officially declared
that i'm in a state of holiday
i can do whatever...
whatever...
that's what scares me...haha
nervous laughter.

it's been another quick year so far
running through accomplishments
one after another
doing things i never thought i could.

i've participated in 4 competitions this year so far...
haha...maybe no more this year...
very stressful...
each and every one of them
haven't won anything yet...
2 lost
2 pending

i've worked 3 jobs this year...3
all architectural.
1 corporate firm
1 design firm
1 self entrepreneurial

i'll be doing my 2nd thesis starting september
topic and site still not determined.

flying on the 9th of september
school starts on the 10th

wave

'with skillful hands he led them'
psalm 78:72

when unsure which course to take
submit your judgment to the spirit of god
asking him to shut every door except the right one
move ahead and consider
the absence of a direct indication
from god to be the evidence of his will
that you are on his path

as you continue down the long road
you will find he has gone before you
locking doors you otherwise would
want to enter

yet out of all the locked doors
you can be sure he has left one unlocked
when you open it and walk through
you will find yourself in the river of opportunity
deeper and wider than you dared imagine
it flows to the open sea

___________________________________________________

sometimes when darkness falls
and every light's gone out
i wonder to what port m frail ship goes
although the night be long
and restless all my hours
my distant goal
i'm sure
my pilot knows

___________________________________________________


riding the waves as the come to me