i work for my classes
to have at least something
to have something great
i work for my classes
to have at least something
to be discussed
love | hate relationship
i would rather be studying for an exam
than to be working on anything
related to architecture
i no longer want to produce
and be judged and criticised
i don't want vague and and obscure direction
'i don't want to lead you in this way'
having the implicit meaning of
'i just don't want to be held responsible
of the mistakes you will make if you don't
do what i say properly'
i want definite answers
i want solidity
not a viscous mish-mash of nonsense
as my courses draw attention away from each other
they all remain in a state of an underdeveloped embryo
this constant balance of work leaves
all in dismay
and have left me ultimately
in the state of dismay
utterly confused
only to realise
there is so much more work
to be
accomplished, digested, manifested,
developed, conjured, understood, painted,
drawn, modeled, read, thought about, discussed,
written, printed, illustrated, diagrammed
to death
on a daily basis.
