one can dream

certainly not too much at work though.

how did we get to june already?
really?

wow.
sure doesn't feel like summer....

and as days continue to fly by because
these permit drawings
don't let up

notes on how to run a proper architecture firm

remember good design aesthetic is the primary goal
don't let administration...contracts...endless meetings
take any away

don't let hierarchy in the office take away
the confidence in people giving their opinion
because they should all be heard and considered

keep the communication constant between colleagues
talking in the office doesn't mean that things don't get done
they probably will get done faster
getting feedback and answered questions
unless it's constant chatter about nothing

the director can do the big important things
and the small not-so-important things

how to get things done
make sure project/competition teams
are small enough to manage themselves
and not get out of hand where team members are unclear
about their responsiblities
and before the meeting ends...
make sure something critical has been decided
meetings to set future meetings...no

and of course...
be the one who doesn't know it all

we chatter about the perfect office
how it would be better somewhere else
how our office can be improved....

how we're never satisified basically...
how the grass is neon green in that office down the street...

though there is plenty justifies the unsatisfaction...

well i dream
the office i start one day with the above traits....
got to quickly finish up those exams.

among the noise

times have been frustrating
as i persists and push against it
nothing seems to happen

i have always thought
i had an ability to understand people
no matter how blunt and rash
they may be
i have had a way of dealing with it
and eventually this behaviour ceases

have you ever been persistantly treated poorly
in an undeserving manner
in which people around you
cannot understand either?

i really want to sympathize with this person
yet her antagoning actions and words
and abusive illusionary power
fluster me beyond belief

it is difficult to move above and beyond it
when this is not an incident in the past
but many, persistant and fresh daily

this person
a coworker

____________________________________________


发觉这世界永远太少空间
因此花一天支配一切时间
发觉这世界永远太晒心机
因此花一天思索一切道理

消失太快 捉得到太少
因此花一天感觉一切是爱茫茫人海
或有几多漂泊与淹盖
人人寻找爱
或有几多争斗与比赛
越觉得剩低几多未变的爱

慢慢地合作新诗
静静地同床午睡
再发现岁月换来几次厌闷几多亲爱
有各样劫灾
和充满意外
因此我要努力继续能恋爱

慢慢地迈向听朝
静静地怀念昨日
再决定今天只要相信爱
叫皱纹散开 唤青春归来
因此我喜欢花一天感觉一切是爱

____________________________________________


as a couple of doors close
another two appear

one door closes with a trusted friend and mentor
i feel deceived
taken advantage
when i entrusted her a project

lessons learned early
with fewer implications
than to learn the lesson
further down the road

one door opened
back to school it led
with me on the opposite side
to what i am used to
taking the chair of guest critic

____________________________________________


it's been a while
to have the chance to sing
an english song at church
as being to cantonese service
with a purpose has now resolved itself
generously from above

with work again tomorrow
in light of economic downturns
i haven't much minded the effects of shortened hours
rather have taken it as an opportunity
to take it easy
and take on other tasks
sleeping more

____________________________________________

among the noise
i have let it go
i can't stop
and catch my breath
and look no futher
for happiness
i will not turn again

humility

i was asked at work 'am i mean?'
when you can ask that question
you probably are...

this morning someone at church
quickly got upset in the parking lot
for not following the rules of the one way traffic

after receiving a stern comment
with no love and forgiveness
without needing to explain myself
i replied with something positive
and i hope he had a moment of realization

i'm glad i read what i did last night below
_________________________________________

thank you for wanting...
how quickly i forget
what's important...

_________________________________________

he said that in our weakness
we are made stronger.
he said that in the kingdom of god
the first will be the last
and the last will be first.
he said that if someone asks you
to walk a mile with him
walk with him two.
he said to love your neighbour as yourself
but more importantly
love your enemies.
he said the humble will be exalted.
jesus said.

it's the opposite of what our culture is teaching
am i pursing what culture wants me to be
or the lifestyle of humility opposed
to the road more traveled

we crave being right
it's the best feeling in the world
we have to be first
we have to win
we lie to be right
we end relationships to be right
we go to war to be right

we spend most of our time trying to mold
others into what we want
we need to appreciate the differences
each person can bring

look no further

I might have been a singer
who sailed around the world

a gambler who wins millions
and spent it all on girls

i might have been a poet
who walked upon the moon

a scientist who would tell the world
i discovered something new

i might have loved a king
been the one to enter war

a criminal who drinks champagne
and never could be caught

but among your books
among your clothes
among the noise and fuss
i've let it go

i can't stop and catch my breath
and look no further
for happiness
and I will not turn again
cause my heart
has found it's home

everyone i'll never meet
and the friends I won't now make
the adventures that they could have been
and the risks i'll never take

but among your books
among your clothes
among your noise and fuss
i've let it go

i can't stop
and catch my breath
and look no further
for happiness
and i will not turn again
cause my heart
has found it's home

look no further - dido

a great privilege

____________________________________

'i think one of the greatest privileges
a person can have
is the opportunity
to work hard at
something that is meaningful to them'

'i have been fortunate and blessed
to be able to
pursue the various lines of work
that are meaningful to me
and to be a part of a family
that i love'

also from
'and you know you should be glad'

i should be glad

one of my hero architects
______________________________________________


another one lost and dropped
because of the work schedule that makes
us lose motivation for things
we really enjoy doing.

______________________________________________

glad you're reading
glad i'm still posting...

______________________________________________

'we all, if we're lucky, have someone
in our lives like Jack - our first friends,
our oldest friends.'

'if we're especially fortunate,
they remain close to us no matter
where the world leads us.'

'we don't have to live in the same cities;
we don't have to see each other on a daily basis.
friendships - especially the oldest friendships -
don't require that.'

'no one knows us better.
no one in our adult lives saw us
the way we first were,
before the inevitable defenses
against a thorny world went up,
before the layers of protective walls
around us were constructed.'

'we didn't invite the arrival of those defenses;
we didn't willingly participate
in the building of those walls.
they come, eventually, with life -
included in the package.'

'we all have someone
who was there before all of that.
if we're lucky, the someone
is with us for a very long time.

excerpted from the book
'and you know you should be glad'

i've long awaited for a book
to bring me back to reading again.
this one is doing the trick.

gone by

days gone by in japan








days gone by in hong kong
__________________________________________________

a summary of days gone by

it's sad to think
that i don't have time for this sort of thing anymore.
writing...
because reading a couple posts back
a couple months and years ago makes me think back
and reignites thoughts

this past week i felt so restless
i became impatient with people i shouldn't have.

i think back to things i said and how i reacted
and sometimes i want to take them back.

for now i'll blame it on the change in weather
and the days getting shorter.

change...
things have changed...
now that i semi live on my own
the family dynamics have changed.

i feel i'm unable to spend enough time with my parents
i enjoy the freedom
and definitely the reduced commute time to less than half
it was before

i sleep more
and i get more done.

my job has been great
coworkers good
bosses good
the creative atmosphere in the office is great
music is played loud for the whole office to hear
and we're all relatively young and very fun
a completely open office
and i got the corner seat with two windows
what more could i ask for
i'm glad i sit beside someone who enjoys talking
and isn't so restrained
because it surely makes the work days go by much faster

sadly our building got bought out and our boss
had to buy another building which is much smaller
and farther away from the city centre.

all the talk right now is about the economy...
even architects are talking economy.
it's so strange.
we'll be in the food court during lunch
with a couple of my coworkers discussing the stock markets
completely clueless of what is going on...

_________________________________________________


i'm not sure if this is good or bad news

the mansion is lost.
the architect has decided to quit.
i'm in an awkward position.

i felt the first loss of a real project.
so much work put in never to see it ever being realized
in real life...
it'll only live on paper.

the architect says she's used to it
that it happens all the time.

paper architecture sucks.
i want to see it built.
i want to learn from it.

_________________________________________________

new job
new place to live
why don't i feel satisfied?
why do i feel miserable and defeated every now and then?

i have the answers
but it's not in my ability to resolve them...

keep praying...